Being Present

The best way to provide reassurance and support for grieving family members and friends is by being present, talking to them, and spending time with them. Here are a few things to keep in mind as you provide comfort for those in the middle of grieving.

• Don’t stress over the words – reach out to those you loved and let them know you’re here for them in any capacity that they’ll need you.
• Allow them the opportunity to speak without interruptions. They may have a lot on their mind, and even if they use you to vent their frustration, it can go a long way in the self-healing process.
• Consider that everyone heals differently and may use different coping mechanisms to help them through difficult times.
• Remain present after the funeral – the pain of death doesn’t end a day, week or month after one passes. Continue to offer support long after the funeral is done.

Sayings to Avoid While Providing Emotional Support

“God has a plan for everyone” – Saying this with good intentions tends to backfire as death has already made a spiritual or religious person question their faith or God. Avoid these conversations until they’ve had more time to process their loss.

“Consider Everything You Still Have” – Understandably, this sentiment is designed to remind a grieving individual there is still so much to smile about. However, at this time, none of it is applicable, and nothing can make them from missing their loved ones.

“They’re in a Better Place” – The grieving friend or family member may carry individualistic beliefs that aren’t aligned with God or a supernatural presence, be courteous of different beliefs by keeping these sentiments to yourself.

“It’s Time to Carry On” – You must understand how this sounds from the perspective of a grieving individual. This saying essentially devalues the feelings of the mourning loved one; as previously stated, mourning takes time, and it must run its course for a full recovery.

Any remark that starts with ‘You Will’ Or ‘You Should’ – Statements such as “You should get out of the house...” or “You will feel better eventually" can be misconstrued as demands rather than helpful tips, which may irritate and annoy your family or friend.

For more information on how to properly console a bereaved family member or good friend, contact Europa today!